And it really has been all the wrong places. But I've decided that I've had enough of the wrong sorts of love. Lately, I've been putting up profiles on all the dating sites, and I've been actually looking at other peoples', really looking for someone I could be happy with. I mean, the chances of finding David Tennant or Alexander Skarsgard there are pretty miniscule, but it's an ideal I can aim for. Right along side all the fictional men that I adore. And the knowledge that's been repeatedly smashed over my head that no real guy can live up to fictional ideals, and the slow acceptance of this fact. I know I can't wait for an actor for another country to randomly find me, and even though I want to, I don't want to die lonely and childless because I spent my whole life waiting. How sucky would that be?
So I'm opening up that door again. I'm looking at guys as if I'd like to date them, and I'm allowing myself to hope that I can find someone I like who likes me, who I could see myself breeding with, and who would give me strong babies.
And I'm documenting it all on my blog for the whole world to see. Because I'm cool like that.
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