2013 In Review!

That about sums it up, Benny.

First! The good! In no real order since I didn't manage to keep up the detailing of facts this past year and so I have to rely on my kind-of-crappy memory:

• Incidental Twin took off and I made some lovely friends through it! I haven't yet broken even, but I'm making enough to keep going and I'm working on some Big Plans for the year to come!
• I graduated Grad School! I was doubting I ever would, but I totally did!
• I finished my novel! And then in November, I wrote another one! Which means I have one compete and one being revised, and I'm working on another, and that's more to sell to an agent as I start off the New Year!
• I got to see a movie in the theatre almost every month because of the kindness of my brother.
• I went to the beach for the first time since leaving Florida.
• I got to visit my best friend over a year after moving away from him!
• I read 46 books.
• I saw Avengers about 37 times because the kids liked to watch it and I liked it better than Spiderman 3 or any of the Transformers, which were the other "let's watch a movie" options they gave me.
• I got to be in on the ground floor as the Sleepy Hollow fandom formed around me* while I watched!
• I finally figured out at least a part of why I've been so unhealthy and started on the path of fixing it.
• I got to Kickstart part of The Veronica Mars movie, the Story War game, the Superfight game, the This Is How You Die game, the Dungeon Roll game, and teeny tiny bits of a number of other games! Which means a return of gaming to my life, at some point.
• I became obsessed with the Halloween update of the Simpsons Tapped Out game. The Christmas one was pretty great, too.
• Also obsessed with Candy Crush Saga, Jelly Splash, and The Silent Age. This last one? I can't wait until I can play the next chapter.
• I've done much better with the floating anxiety and depression I've been arguing with inside my brain chemistry for the last ten years or so.
• I got to watch the wonderful Doctor Who 50th Anniversary Special live because the Beeb simulcasted it. It was so great knowing that the whole world's Doctor Who fandom was watching and screaming and crying at the same time as I was.

And now the bad! Because every life is a pile of good things and a pile of bad things:

• My dad had a series of mini-stokes at the beginning of the year, and it was rough for a while.
• Mom was sick and hurt way too often.
• I fell in the tub and cracked a few of my ribs on Valentines Day; if that doesn't sum up my current relationship with romance, I don't know what does.
• I was really unwell at the beginning of the year.
• I have not yet found an agent, and that's sad-making and anxiety-inducing.
• I didn't manage to finish my micro-fic-a-day challenge I set myself; I'm apparently not good with challenges that don't have defined ends.
• I still haven;t figured out how to make friends here, or where to go to find cool people, and sometimes I feel really isolated.
• Raleigh is not all it's cracked up to be.
• I missed a number of concerts I really wanted to go to because of rampant poorness.

Really, this year doesn't have a lot to complain about. I mean, it was better than the upheaval that was 2012, and it was rough often, and depressing sometimes, but not as bad or as specific as a lot of the years right before it, so I don't have a lot to say on the bad list. And I'd much rather focus on the good list, you know? 

How did your last year go, lovely readers?

Notes:
* When I say 'around me' I mean, I was there, not that I had a central role in it. Just to be clear.

Year in Review: 20 Questions for a New Year’s Eve Reflection

I found these questions on incourage.me

1. What was the single best thing that happened this past year?

If you've been following my plight, you know that it's kind of hard to identify much good that's happened, but I'll go with "being home with my family". I'd been living in a different state for almost a decade, and I'd missed daily contact with everyone. We were a tight unit throughout our whole childhoods, just the five of us, and it's nice to have some of that back. I didn't even realize how much I missed knowing my sister's kids, for instance!

2. What was the single most challenging thing that happened?

The flip side of the previous statement--"moving home as an independent adult". I'd gotten used to fending for myself, to living on my own, being my own person with my own life, and being forced, after a year of being out of work and being a burden on my best friend, to come back to live with my parents again...it was hard. It's still hard. Not because we don't get along, but because almost everything I own is locked away in storage three states away and I can't afford to pay to bring it up here, because I have almost no income, because I went from having a whole house of my own to having a room and a bunch of shared space. It's crazy.

3. What was an unexpected joy this past year?

How much fun it is to make my own nail polish! A year ago, I didn't even know you could make your own, and now I have a business where I get to make maybe a dozen new colors and finishes a month!

4. What was an unexpected obstacle?

Depression--I didn't realize just how much these life changes were going to depress me and literally weigh me down. I've been next to useless more times in the second half of this year than I have been in ages.

5. Pick three words to describe 2012.

Sucky. Challenging. Poor.

6. Pick three words your spouse would use to describe your 2011 (don’t ask them; guess based on how you think your spouse sees you).

I don't have a spouse, but I think an outside observer might pick: Overwhelmed. Choiceless. Annoyed.

7. Pick three words your spouse would use to describe their 2011 (again, without asking).
Again, no spouse, not even someone who could stand in for one. So I'm just not going to answer this one.

8. What were the best books you read this year?
Oh, man, picking and choosing! I listed all the books I read on the Writing Blog; my favs were:

• The Killing Moon / The Shadowed Sun - NK Jemisin
• Grave Mercy - Robin LaFevers
• Clockwork Prince / City of Lost Souls - Cassandra Clare
• Graveyard Book / American Gods - Neil Gaiman
• Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking - Susan Cain
• Ghost Story - Jim Butcher
• The Nerdist Way - Chris Hardwick
• Bird By Bird - Anne Lamott
• Let's Bring Back...

All in all, a pretty good book-year!

9. With whom were your most valuable relationships?
Before I moved:

• H and A, A and L

Since I moved:

• Mom and Dad, Bro, Sis, and A1 and A2 and R

10. What was your biggest personal change from January to December of this past year?
Again, living in a new state, where I know almost no one outside of family, where I don't know the names of the plants or what they can be used for, where I don't know what to plant or when, or what to expect from the weather. It's been very strange.

11. In what way(s) did you grow emotionally?
I've been learning a lot about what it takes to stay happy and non-depressed, and now to get out of depression when it strikes. I've been learning about reconnecting with family and letting people in again, not being so self-contained. I've been learning about not negating parts of my personality just because other people might think it's weird, which is, really, an ongoing learning experience since I was a kid.

12. In what way(s) did you grow spiritually?
I haven't paid a whole lot of attention to spirituality this year. Or last year. Or, really, much of the year before that. I have been missing the togetherness of having people with similar beliefs around, though, and I've been relearning that I do need to spend more time thinking in terms of spiritual awareness, if not religious stuff. I've subscribed to several emails that send little snippets of spiritual seeking each day, and it's been great having little moments to reflect, even a little, and to remember that I'm not just a brain in a body, I'm also something bigger than the sum of my parts, and I fit into a bigger universe still.

13. In what way(s) did you grow physically?
Outward! I've put on so much weight since moving up here--a combo of readily-available junk food, less control over what I eat day to day, and laziness. I did sign up for the gym, and I was going every other day, rain or shine, for three months, but I've since lost the ability to pay for it, and my Bro has mostly decided to let it lapse and he was my workout partner, so I have to find some other way to get exercise in my life. I did learn, however, that I kind of do like working out, if the right sorts of activities are available--the treadmill with a book, primarily, or the elliptical with a TV on. And there's a soothing regularity to counting sets on a weight-machine that I never noticed before.

14. In what way(s) did you grow in your relationships with others?
Probably not enough! I'm working on reconnecting, and on finding ways to find new friends--that's one of my goals this year, Find Friends. 

15. What was the most enjoyable part of your work (both professionally and at home)?
When the writing is going well. It was great finishing a rough draft of the novel, a fantastic feeling as all the pieces started to come together and pan out on their own! And as I said before, I love making nail polish, even if sales aren't enough to counteract the cost of supplies yet.

16. What was the most challenging part of your work (both professionally and at home)?
Staying focused. Working every day, even when I don't want to and the whole world seems determined to annoy me and eat up my time. Revisions--I'm apparently a fast writer and a really slow reviser. Making money! Some day, I want to be able to live off the patchwork income of all my various passions, but I'm so not near that now!

17. What was your single biggest time waster in your life this past year?
I'm trying really hard not to think  in terms of time wasted and time not wasted. I think the days when I'm less productive are symptoms of other issues I should be paying attention to, and so they aren't wasted--they're just unexpectedly diverted.

18. What was the best way you used your time this past year?
Writing. Always writing. If I'm writing, everything is right with the world.

19. What was biggest thing you learned this past year?
I'm a holistic being with lots of different effects from lots of different sources, and I need to come up with ways to deal with myself in all moods and all healths, so that I can keep being creative and productive, even when I don't feel like it.

20. Create a phrase or statement that describes 2011 for you.

"Could've been a heck of a lot better, but seems to have turned out alright for now."

2009, the year in review

What a crap year. For every advance, there was always something bad to knock it back down. It's like a Star Trek movie: all the odd-numbered ones suck.

- I did not find love

- I was unemployed for my birthday

- I'm back at minimum wage, and had to get a second job to even hope to make up for it

- I ate seasonally for most of a year until I became so poor that I couldn't even afford the farmer's market, and fresh food has been right off the menu for ages

-Related: I extended my year of eating seasonally so I can fill out the Lists and complete my research before I start shopping the book

- I did not get published, because I did not send anything out

- I got accepted to grad school! I had to push it back, and paying off school loans has made me even poorer than before, but they were kind enough to let me keep my spot. I interpret this to mean they really liked my story-fragment.

- I only got a bad cold once, and that was right at the end of the year.

- We got a new cat and a new dog.

- I started writing articles for Examiner, and made enough money to pay for the Food and Wine festival this year.

- Death is far too common, and I'm tired of people dying around me.

- I took up hooping, and have been moderately successful at keeping it consistent. Have plans to get / make pro-weight ones that will help me work out better.

- My bike was stolen, and I'm on foot again.

- I got my contributer's copy of Fiction International, and my book review was published ahead of schedule, but I didn't get any more commissions from them.

- I started this blog!

- I managed a little more than half of a novel during NaNoWriMo

- I started organizing my brain and my schedule so I can get stuff done.

- I did not travel anywhere; I almost didn't make it to ICFA, let alone anywhere else.

- I saw several movies I really liked, and in the theatre, too!

- I kept a garden alive all summer, but hardly got any food from it, though I did get lots of lovely roses that went into a jar with black tea.

- My ovaries shut down.

- I started reading 100 books in a year, starting on my birthday, and made it to twenty before the end of the year.

- I learned how to make my own limoncello and related liquors.

So here's to 2010 being infinitely better!