crisis management

No details, since I don't have permission to give them to the internets, but there was a crisis when we got home from a dull and annoying day at work on Monday, and it's resulted in hospital visits, many calls, and no time for all the side work I do. I'm fine, but one of the room mates is probably not, and we're still waiting for news, apparently. I work today, so I won't be there, and I'm starting my second job tomorrow, so I won't be there then, either.

This is probably selfish, but I feel like it's the universe slapping me in the face. Whenever I think things are going well, something crappy and unexpected happens to someone I care about, or I lose my job and someone starts spreading vicious rumors about me that keep me from getting another one for a long time, or all my bills bounce because of one small thing that I didn't remember to write down or something equally out of my control. And it leaves me devastated and knocked entirely off track. That wobbling platform where my mind and my sense of wellbeing lives is tilted again, and I feel like I'm scrabbling at nothing to try and keep it all together. I'm pretty sure this is how crisis works, but it's not something I'm good at handling, and I'm trying really hard not to internalize the fear and the uncertainty and trying not to shut down and zombie through life. That doesn't help anything at all, especially not when someone's in the middle of a Big Writing Project, and not when someone's time is being consumed by multiple jobs.

But I feel better since I vented here. Thank you, internets.